Sunday, September 25, 2011

For me?

I havent blogged lately just because life is so busy. I am so looking forward to my  fall break.  I need some time to get my house back together.

A good friend asked me last night about my progress and a question came up " who are you doing this for?"  It is a very good question for anyone on this journey especially if you have failed before or several times at weight loss. 

First of all I am not doing it for anyone buy myself but I do take my kids into consideration with wanting to be healthier for them. An example would be when I don't do things with them because of my weight- that rollercoaster ride or zip line they want to do. Again it involves them but comes back to me as well because I want to do those things with them before they are adults.

Self- confidence is another reason that I am to improve. I mean who doesn't want to look better? But for me it goes deeper than physical appearance- I want to feel better.

My last reason (there may be more coming) is to physically be healthier. I am sick of feeling tired when doing things.  I want to be in better shape.

Well those are my "me" reasons. My current weight loss is 25 pounds and one clothing size in 4 weeks. I havent cheated even when I want a Jet's pizza.

Tuesday, September 13, 2011

80 sticks of butter

This morning was my official weigh in for week 3..... I lost a total of 20.6 pounds...that's 80 sticks of butter!!! I excited and my next big goal seems like it's attainable.

Monday, September 12, 2011

Bad day... No sleep

Attorneys, arguments, and no sleep.

Our dog has been sick so I am writing this on having 1 hour of sleep in the past two days. If I don't make sense now you understand. I spent last night taking the dog in and outside all night long- getting eaten by mosquitos, and not sleeping. My eyes did not want to open today.

My day didn't seem to get better when I was unable to get my evaluation results bc the principal was in a meeting; my classes didn't go as planned, or my progress with the divorce either. I spent my day running from Lebanon to Donelson back to Mt Juliet back to Donelson then to Lebanon then back to Mt Juliet in a matter of time. I had skipped my third MF meal so by the time o was done at 5pm I was starving and ready for a meal. Stress and tiredness wanted to go through the drive in- made me want to eat something for that moment but instead chose just to go eat a meal (petite sirloin with broccoli and a side salad). I was glad I was able to think clearly with no sleep, with the stressful day, and running around.

There have been times today I have wanted to give up, not go on, crawl under a rock and hide but I can't do that being the primary caregiver. Instead we ate dinner and did homework and now it's bed time. I found this quote that helped me through today. It is also used as the benediction at our new church.


May the love of God be above you to over-shadow you
Beneath you to uphold you
Before you to guide you
Behind you to protect you
Close beside you and within you to make
you able for all things:

Sunday, September 11, 2011

Skinny Margaritas??

So last night I went to a neighbors house and tried to stay OP (on plan) it wasn't a complete fail though. Let me back up to dinner...I decided to eat here before going so I cooked a tenderloin and some zucchini and summer squash. Yummo!! It was awesome but half way through I started to feel super nauseous to the point I really thought I would get sick. I would try a bite and the food tasted great but then I would feel sick so after eating half I just threw it away.At the party I did really good I had made 2 oz of pulled pork( yes I know it's not on my list) and that was it...I was there 6 hours!!

Another thing not OP was the margaritas but I stuck to the no calorie only 1 carb mix... I don't feel too bad about it because I want to enjoy my life...it was a good alternative for me.

A bunch of the neighbors were there and the girls had a blast.....I think the skinny margarita was not as good but if u are dieting a great alternative if you want to drink!!

New favorite quote:


“Live life fully while you're here. Experience everything. Take care of yourself and your friends. Have fun, be crazy, be weird. Go out and screw up! You're going to anyway, so you might as well enjoy the process. Take the opportunity to learn from your mistakes: find the cause of your problem and eliminate it. Don't try to be perfect; just be an excellent example of being human.”
~ Anthony Robbins

Friday, September 9, 2011

Distraction is Good.

Distractions?

So my medical insurance plan at work is having tons of changes. Everyone is having to get blood work and have assessments to see if you fit any of the categories associated with an increased health risk. There are five categories: BMI, Blood glucose level, Blood pressure, Cholesterol and Triglycerides ( I think I might be forgetting one- dang). Each employee had to have blood work done, a follow-up visit, and if you did not meet each indicator for each group you were put into a health rish group and had to follow a plan. Basically they give you 90 days to complete your tasks they assign- for example if your blood sugar was high you would have to attend a diabetes class. Your insurance premiums would increase if you did not follow the plan or are unsuccessful. Well the good news is that I passed all the health risks except of course BMI. So I am also enrolled in their weight management and exercise courses. It is stuff you do online. I just started to look at it, luckily there is an iphone app to help. You have to log your weight and complete several tasks each week. Hopefully this is just another incentive to stay on my plan and continue to lose. My tasks for this week were to report my week, complete a questionaire and fax it back, report a cardiocvascular workout daily, track aerobic activity for each day, and take two quizes. This is gonna be a lot of work.

When I had my blood work done, my thyroid was high. I am having to take a different dose of medication to try to get it adjusted. My Vitamin D level is also low, which the doctor said can also make it harder to lose weight. So now I am taking a Vitamin D/Calcium supplement. I think getting my thyroid back in line will do nothing but help me. I can use all the help I can get.


Needless to say I am a little overwhelmed. I have had two very stressful weeks (well its been a stressful 10 months) with another coming up. I need to overcome the stress so that I can move forward with my life and finalize plans for the future. It's not easy ending a marriage but I am trying to stay distracted. I can say that the girls and I have found a church that we love and enjoy. Both girls are active in extra curricular activities. I am busy working at the dance studio two nights a week working the front desk. I have had two teacher evaluations on our new system and find out the results on Monday of my last one. We started our School restaurant this week and it went great. I am getting along with my co-workers better than ever this year. I think they are just empathetic to my situation or maybe I am easier to get along with also. I have one class I love and one class that I hate this year, which is making my job very difficult. Distraction is good when it comes to this exact moment in my life and I am actually thankful to have them to keep my mind preoccupied.

All of these things, the stress, kids, finances, ending a marriage.... the list can go on -could be something that makes me breakdown. In fact not very long ago I was talking to a friend daily on the verge of depression- ok I was depressed- not understanding why things happen the way they do but I can't explain the moment that it clicked for me that I was in control of what happens to ME. I know I can't control what others do and yet I know that I am incapable of doing things alone and so thankful for the people who hold me up right now. I know that I can not do things without these special people in my life. But for me, I feel like I am finally doing something for me. I can't explain how Medifast is doing that for me but it is. Do I miss certain foods ? YES Is it hard to be around others that don't have restrictions? YES Do I hate some of the foods I have ordered but eat it anyway because I paid $16.50 a box for it? YEP

But is it worth it to me at this very moment? ABSOLUTELY.

Saturday, September 3, 2011

Week 2: Remember to Eat!

This week I have not been as hungry- I keep having to remember to eat! It might sound stupid but I know I need to get my 5 Medifast meals in each day for the nutrition I need- but I haven't been hungry.

I did try mashed cauliflower and spaghetti squash. It was pretty good almost like potatoes. My new favorite is zucchini chips- as good as chips to me! My next month supplies should be here today or Tuesday- trying some new products.

The hard things seem to be getting easier- I love the MF fb page which I visit constantly for support and ideas.

Sunday
My morning ritual while still in bed is to read all the posts on the fb page- it keeps me motivated to see what people are experiencing with their weight loss and their struggles as everyone has them. It's the best support tool.

Sorry been super busy. Week 2 2 pounds total 17.5 pounds.